Showing posts with label naughty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label naughty. Show all posts

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Patient Notes: Dragon McTavish








Case Notes: 4 year old male patient presented well after bed time with severe Textatinge to the face, hands and feet.  Further examination also showed Textatinge to the torso with the most worrying symptom being the dark tint to the belly button.  The child's mother said he was supposed to be sleeping and she knew he was finding it hard to fall asleep but had no idea of his condition until he came to her while she sat enjoying the quiet of the house.  

Pay careful note to the back of the right hand.  The Textatinge seemed to only go to his wrist initially, but upon closer examination after the images were taken, it was discovered it was far more serious and ended closer to the elbow than the wrist.  Initial treatment was discussed and it was suggested that we let the Textatinge wear off with time and the child give the cause to all who ask, a common combined form of the treatments "Imasillydill" and "Embarrassment".  After further discussion that treatment seemed too strong for a first outbreak and another common treatment was decided upon with a topical application of dihydrogenmonoxide (H2O).  The Textatinge did not immediately clear up and certain areas responded better than others with the forehead showing the best (and most rapid) improvement.  Treatment will continue over the course of a few days with the added treatment of a liquid detergent at approximately 24 hours after the first symptoms appeared combined with a dihydrogenmonoxide bath.

Should the Textatinge return in the future we will discuss more severe treatments to deter further outbreaks.

Dr McTavish.


Did I ever tell you I loved working as a clinical photographer?  If only all my cases had been this cute (and non-infectious).

Sunday, 17 May 2009

Mr Clothing Optional and an open letter to Playschool

The dumping ground of Mr Clothing Optional
"I decided not to put my pants back on mum"

That's 4 pairs of pants and 1 pair of PJ's.



Dear Playschool,


First I would like to say thank you. Thank you for providing a high quality half hour show for my kids to watch (three times a day if I need it). Thank you for the endless craft ideas you have given me for my kids to refuse to participate in. Thank you for giving me a daily reminder to feed my kids morning tea. I relish the cries while I am in the middle of something "MUUUUM, Playschool's over, can we have morning tea?" it sounds strange, I know, but it means that nap time is just around the corner.
I often like the suggestions at the end of the show, you know the ones... "You might like to build a block tower or play in some sand... goodbye" But your suggestion on Monday left a sour taste in my mouth... "You might like to measure how tall you are" DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT IS AN INTELLIGENT THING TO SUGGEST TO SMALL CHILDREN WITH ACCESS TO TEXTAS?
My pottering around was severely disrupted when I heard the words "now you measure me against the wall" coming from my sweet little four year old. This was not before he had apparently measured his little brother 15 times at varying heights (and one where he grew significantly right in the middle of the measuring) and also the pet crocodile.
So Playschool, I present you with this...
You owe my children 2 minutes of their life back each to replace the 2 minutes each they spent in time out for following your suggestion.
You owe me one magic eraser. I would ask for more but I doubt there is much you can do about my sanity being severely shaken after that little episode.

Saturday, 21 February 2009

Dragon's First Post

This Morning, I got into a lot of trouble. Daddy let me colour in a paper plane which he showed me how to make, but flying it and colouring it was too boring. Do you know what else was boring? The colour scheme of the house, so I decided to make it better.

I took some nice looking coloured pencils and re-coloured the New table , Nanno & Pappap bought me and Lion, I coloured in the Chairs, Nanno & Pappap bought me & Lion. For good measure I thought it would look good 'distressed' so I banged the table and chair a few times with my sharp pencils. Once that job was done the carpet in the living room needed to be re-coloured and once I finished that I thought a big dose of spit and a dance on would compliment the look.

That caused Daddy to do a of a lot 'loud babbling'. He went red in the face and a vein popped out on this neck and started throbbing quite rapidly... I've never seen that before, but from what happened next I will need to remember that as a bad sign and start running next time I see that happen.

Anyway, I spent a lot of time in 'Time-Out' solitary this morning and when Mummy came back I had to apologise to her for redecorating the house, Dragon Style. Then Mummy said that everyone would be having Macca's for lunch but not me, I decided that maybe it was time to put things right.

P.S. I wonder if I should show them the rest of the redecorating I did?... nah!

- Dragon McT