Thursday, 18 June 2009

Middle Child Syndrome

Apparently I was 3 when I informed my mum that "I'm a middle child, I don't get anything". Yeah for those that know me they are thinking "but..." and that is what I inform my mum... I had to be at least 5 1/2 because the little usurper brother didn't turn up until then.

So anyway... I really was a middle child. I really did get nothing. Although a lot of the nothing that I got my brother and sister also got. You know what... I don't even remember most of it. I think I am probably a better person for not having a lot of it... fashionable clothes, well, I always had clothes, hand me downs and some new but nothing with a brand plastered across the front, it's saving me money now because I know that I don't NEED them to survive... "trendy" lunches with chips and pre-packaged junk, I know my kids will survive without them and I am probably a lot healthier for not having had them when I was young... Pocket money, we went through stages with this but for the most part there was none, there were also no chores charts, we were expected to help out when asked and were given the guarantee that all that we needed would be provided to us... The "it" toy, well that's a different story, a sad, sad story, one I will share with you now...

She was the dorkiest in the class, the rest of the girls had their tiny little ball gowns and wedding gowns and fashion bags slung over their slender wrists... she had clothes made by mum, no purse, shoes that didn't quite match the outfit... she was my barbie. That's right, lower case "b", she wasn't real. She was the generic version. My friends had all decided to bring their Barbie dolls to some event, perhaps it was a sleep-over or a birthday party or just our mums getting us all together to wear us out, but she was the only generic. She had undies... that set her apart too... I am not sure why but my mum sewed undies for all our dolls at one stage... I guess I can see the sense in that now, there was a boy in the house! We had a few "barbies" and at one stage I even got a real Barbie. Just one but it was mine and it was real and it came in it's box, not from life-line or the dump. Yes, you read that right... the dump. That was how we got our Barbie car or something-or-other. Dad went to the dump shortly after Christmas, keep in mind, this was the "olden days", about 1988 BL (before litigation), when kids were allowed out of the car and anyone could climb all over the piles of goodness knows what in search of treasures to take home with them. Anyway, this particular time we didn't go with him but he took the big ol' Hiace van with the trailer hooked up full of rubbish and went about his business of unloading it. As he was leaving a truck pulled up near him... from Toyworld. Full of all the post Christmas returns. Things that were not quite right. Board games with bits missing, toys that were broken before they were even unwrapped, those sort of things... so like any good dad would he started loading up the trailer. He figured sort it out at home and just go back to the dump with anything that wasn't worth keeping. In amongst all that was a for-real Barbie car. It was fine. Some of the stuff really had nothing wrong with it, others were almost deffinately broken by their new owner, other things were manufacturing problems. It was a real mixed bag and some of it did go in the bin.

So back to my sad story... barbie wasn't the only dark cloud on my toy horizon... I didn't get a glow worm either. You know the ones... their little soft wormy bodies, some even had wings, their little hard plastic head that would glow when you cuddled them at night... yep, none in my bed, I slept with tartan teddy, his little orange teddy head didn't glow, he just wore his red tartan overalls day in and day out. My friends ALL had glow worms, I know they did, I may not have inspected each and every bed but I know that they had them and I was the only one that missed out... after all, I had the worst childhood ever.

But the clincher... Did you ever want a doll that looked just like you? was a kid like you? A Cabbage Patch Kid? Yep, I sure did! Oh how I desperately wanted one... the one with freckles on it's nose just like me, with non-descript mousey brown hair and freckles... JUST LIKE ME! I don't know if they actually made that particular model but the ads said I could get one just like me and that was me so there must be one out there! Anyway, I hoped and hoped and hoped for one... I knew that if I wanted it enough I would find one in the cabbage patch just like they did on the ads... okay, that's not the truth, I wasn't that stupid, I realised that my parents needed to buy it and we didn't even have a cabbage patch anyway. Unfortunately no Cabbage Patch Kid ever turned up for me. I know, it's a sad, sad story today... but it gets worse... remember how I'm the middle child? Yeah, SHE got one. Chimera was given a Cabbage Patch Kid. I think our aunt bought it for her... at least it hurts less if I think that it was anyone but our parents. She came with a birth certificate and her very own brush, she was special! But she wasn't mine.

I had special toys... I just didn't have her. The Cabbage Patch Kid with the freckles on her nose and the non-descript mousey brown hair... "Just Like Me".

*choking back tears* this post has been brought to you today by Boondock Ramblings for Lisa's Chime In posts... *sniff* This weeks theme was our childhood toys... *weeps* stop on by her blog to read about the special toys in other peoples lives... *now braks into heart wrenching sobs* probably the ones that they really actually had because they weren't a middle child... *has to leave the room*

Mum- I am not scarred for life, this is a literary work, not a heartfelt response to your parenting... That will come later;)

Tartan Teddy- I do love you, I just didn't know how much at the time, you were so much better than any possessed worm! I just wont bring you home with me because I know that you are safer at mum's house.

Kanga- I was going to blog about you but it would have been short... "This is Kanga, she has no tail, she has a pouch with a disembodied head in it." I protect you from my boys, you know I love you still.


  1. Nurse Boy and I are CRACKING UP!!! Awesome post!!! Why is it we all feel like we were deprived in our childhood in some way??

    And, for the record, I was always sad that my Cabbage Patch didn't look like me!!! You are so right...that is what they claimed. Your doll could look just like you, but when the women were trampling over everyone, you had to just grab and go!!! No shopping, picking and choosing. Oh, no!

    Mine was suppose to had blonde hair and blue eyes. No freckles. Sigh.

    But, now I sound like a brat, don't I? Sorry! ;0)

    Maybe your sister and I can meet and share our dolls. Sorry, no "barbies" with undies are invited. If you had a glow worm, maybe you could have come.

    I'm just saying...

    Mrs. Nurse Boy

  2. They didn't have Cabbage patch dolls when I was little.

    I am the youngest and I always wanted a doll house. I guess my parents couldn't afford it. Or maybe I never told them (which I find hard to believe, lol!).

    I suppose a dollhouse was just to much money, but I did get a Barbie doll which I loved, and my mom did make me clothes for it!

    My kids never got the nintendos and big stuff they wanted, until years and years later when someone was upgrading and gave us their old one.

    I figured, I survived not getting a doll house and they'll survive too.

    Sniff....sniff.....seriously, how hard is it to buy a dollhouse....sniff...waaaaahhh!

  3. I am so sorry! That totally stinks. I had lots of Barbies...still do. Do you want me to send you one? I would even send you a Cabbage Patch doll. Dark hair and freckles you say? I shall look for one for you.

    I'm sorry this brought back such traumatic memories for you. Will I need to pay for your therapy? :-)

    P.S. I want to know all about poor Kanga next! :-)

  4. Hang on, I didn't have a cabbage patch kid, or a glow worm either, and I'm the eldest!
    I think I begged for both, but we (including my deprived younger sisters, both middle children, though I think tecnically L is a youngest according to the birth order theory) already had ample Barbies and a thousand other things, so I'd say Mum figured I didn't need MORE toys.

  5. I always wanted a pony... and a minibike, my parents bought me neither.

    Although... my grandparents did buy me a minibike, whoo hoo what fun that was, although I don't think that Lion or Dragon will be allowed to have one, [whisper] not because of the things I got up to on it but because I'm afraid of what Mummy McT will scream at me when I do. [end whisper]

  6. I had a glowworm and a silky haired Cabbage Patch Kid, which did look like me! Though I didn't know they were supposed to, and I think that was just by chance, as mum and dad said that I got the last one in Townsville. I was NEVER allowed Barbies though, I had a slightly bigger alternative. My grandparents once gave me a Barbie, but it didn't last long with two brothers around. One of them cut off all it's hair - hoping it would grow back! My dad and uncles (I think) made me a doll house, which was great - but none of my dolls ever fitted in it! =)
    I think being the only girl in the family helped somewhat.

  7. I was right with you there (well except the middle child thing - being the eldest I think they just get more spoilt the further down the line they go) right until the cabbage patch thing. My sister & I were both given CPdolls from our granny & aunty for Christmas one year. I had to save mine a couple of times from my Mum's rubbish cleanouts (who cares if she's got a tear in the side, she's still my baby) & now she sits pride of place in the toy cupboard (I have had to protect her from my boys too).
    As for barbies - well we only had the generic also (of course the younger sisters got the real thing - sigh!!)

  8. Wow, Who to respond to... well...

    @Mrs NB - My mum told me the best response to bullies was to just ignore them. You can go play with your CPK that DOESN'T LOOK LIKE YOU and I'll remain the well balanced person that I am who removed my toys from their packaging when I first got them, not 20+ years later.

    @Momstheword - Oh, I forgot I didn't have a dolls house either... we had to use cardboard boxes... thanks for bringing that up for me.

    @Lisa - So will your insurance cover paying for my therapy... "well you see nice insurance company people, I started this thing on my blog and now this chick in Australia needs therapy and it's my fault because I reminded her of her deprived childhood".

    @Jillian- You can imagine then how we spoil Little Bear! I'd go buy her a CPK except it would hurt too much to watch her play with it... sniff...

    @Renata - No, they do not get more spoilt as they go down the line. The oldest gets everything new and the youngest never gets punished. It's the poor middle child that gets nothing except hand-me-downs and gets punished.

    What a hot topic the old CPK was... remind me not to bring up bitter childhood memories again!


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